groundhogs.

it's currently -12 and march twenty-fourth.
groundhog reported 6 more weeks of winter... yeah.
it's a god damn ground hog, what the hell does it know? the only reason he poked his head out is because we're making so much noise that he wants us to frig off.
But really?
soooo, just because some little dude pokes his head out of a hole at a certain time it determines how much winter there will be? Maybe i'm just going to start believing that depending on how many snow cones are eaten in a city in one hour on a particular day will determine the length of snow left. just divide that number by 14 because i happen to like the way that number looks, and then thats how many minutes of snow is left.
or maybe if you eat three blue whale candies under a street lamp while jumping, summer is on its way.
or maybe, i could move some place where the people aren't so desperate and psychotic that they actually turn to animal to tell them when the misery of winter will come to an end.