Monday, August 11, 2014

the real story.


I used to dream about fairytales.

I could picture falling in love. I thought it would feel like an explosion, an immediate realization.

We would exchange poetry in the moonlight. He would know everything about me before I could tell him. He would read my mind, take me on romantic dates, and tell me how beautiful I am. I would be a princess. “I’m a hopeless romantic.” A stubborn one, too.

I remember someone telling me “Fairytales don’t exist. That’s ridiculous. No one can be that way.”

“They do exist!” I said.



They don’t.

And I couldn’t be happier to admit it. I don’t want any of the things I did when I was younger.


Turns out, falling in love isn’t like an explosion.

It’s not exchanging poetry, it’s telling each other how excited you are to share a life together.

It’s not reading each other’s minds (who does that?) it’s getting to know someone, with ease.

It’s giggling at your inside jokes.

It’s taking care of each other.

It’s being a team.

It’s growing together, learning together. Becoming a family.

It’s not a “fairytale” it’s what ever your story is.

It’s the most comfortable feeling you know. It’s peace.

It’s home.



intimate.


I love you without knowing how, or when, or from where.  I love you simply, without problems or pride:

I love you in this way because i do not know any other way of loving but this, in which there is no i or you, so intimate that when i fall asleep your eyes close.

Pablo Neruda.



You know you're in love when you don't want to fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams.

Dr. Seuss

my new home.





home used to be where i grew up
where my family lived

it used to be a smell
a feeling

and the sound of laughter.

when those things changed
i thought i'd never be home again

but tonight
i could smell home.
i could feel home.

and it was when you hugged me.

---




Tuesday, August 5, 2014

"one life time isn't enough to love you."





content.






i remember meeting you, hoping it wasn't the last.

before you there was pain
fear
doubt

now 
all i know is love
and all i needed was you.












i'm loving more
and writing less.

--

Thursday, July 31, 2014

Its about agreeing on the things that matter and compromising on the things that don't.

Thursday, July 10, 2014

Friday, June 27, 2014

What I wanted to tell you this week.

I met a new friend at the gym. Her name was Nicole.

De Beers called me back with an estimate.

I found a really good recipe for lemon dill chicken.

I painted my nails red for the wedding.

I killed it at work this week.

I miss you.

Wednesday, June 25, 2014

i wish you'd show up at my door.

Tuesday, June 17, 2014

Lets find a way to live forever.

"Do you want to live for a long time?"

"Only if it's with you, yeah."

Wednesday, June 11, 2014

Home.

"Love is like coming home after a long trip.

Love is like coming home."

Sunday, June 1, 2014

Rain.

"I'm going to love you for as many days as there are rain drops tonight. Which means I am going to love you for this whole lifetime and into my next. Which makes me the happiest person, because I get to love you for more than one lifetime."

And that night, it poured.

Thursday, May 22, 2014

upside.





content,

she looked up

and saw the world backwards.

who knew it was this way all along.