i'm not giving up on you.

happy.

Ground.

You ground me.
When I'm frantic, or lose my way, you bring me back to reality - back on solid ground.

there are only choices.

and this one was yours.

---

my home is a heart ache.

key.

:)

HE 

WINS

when it feels right

it is.

partner.

treasure.

vulnerable

has never felt so good.

and now

the trivial insecurities of my past

are no more.

muse.

-you are my muse-

--

So happy I can barely study.

You look good in white sheets.

Lights.

Long roads
Flashing lights
Blank stares
Fleeting hearts.

Life.

A vicious and relentless cycle of inspirations.

make.

what we made

was love.

dreamers.

we're dreamers.

i can see it in your bright blue eyes
every morning.

whiskey.

you're that warm feeling after a shot of whiskey.

--

speechlessness has never felt so good.

it's hard to write about someone who makes you speechless.

what you make of it.

people fight.
we make mistakes.
things get messy.

but its only what you make of it.

If you are too stupid to see what's in front of you,

I guarantee you won't be too stupid to see it when it's gone.

you have all the best parts of everyone else

(including extras)

real.

girls,
giddy.

falling for men.

this time, for real.

our story.

white 

hot

glamour

thank you universe :)

finally falling

without fear

--

sink or swim.

and when it finally comes down to it,

will you sink or swim?

i can't wait to see you.

up.

i have those butterflies that don't go away.

i have that grin, like an idiot.

i have an anxious, racing brain,

day dreaming about the next place we'll go.

this time.

it's different this time.

i trust you.

"who's sweaty hand is this?"

- "mine."

swoon.

good kiss.

i remember saying "it was just a good kiss. a one time thing. a random guy, at a random bar."

i also remember doubting every word.

funny,

i should have known better.

i should have known you were more than that,

because now i get to wake up next to you.

--

i know, love. i'm scared too.

but not as scared as i thought i'd be.

Shit that was good.

your smile is bigger than my doubts.

Let's see how lucky you think you are.

i turned away from all the others.

talk.

i like to watch you talk.

the way your lip twitches when you say certain words,

the way your lips slide over your teeth,

the way your tongue moves when you laugh.

no one talks like you.

getting close to you is comfortable.

like tea

or socks

or orgasms, with socks on.

i have no problem falling

or getting up.

sexdrugsandhomework

yeah,

you are my guy.

you should come over.

i like the way you smell.

musk and rain.

get some.

cloud nine.

take me away 

warm breeze

silk

spice.

this song.

smitten.

"i guess it's just hard, you know? 

looking around to see everyone happy, together

and realizing you're just as happy, alone."

-

all talk.

you're all talk.

talk 

talk talk

talk talk talk.

old you.

i didn't give up on you,

you gave up on you,

and it's your fault i only love the "old you."

Good advice.

There may be some event or situation from the past that still causes you pangs of guilt or regret when you think about it. So why do you keep thinking about it? For whatever reason, you just can't get past it. But you must. What's done is done. So go back to that time just once more, and acknowledge that you might do things differently now. At the same time, though, you need to recognize that you did what you did back then because it was all you knew how to do. Maybe you made a mistake. Maybe you had some weakness in an area in which you are now stronger. Forgive yourself, and move on.

monday nights.

i wish i could call you and tell you to come over.

i'd warm up some soup and we could have lemon squares.

i'd tell you about my day, you'd make me laugh until i cried.

we would watch videos.

make love.

watch more videos.

it would get late, and you'd just stay over (on your side of the bed).

then i wouldn't have to miss you - and wonder "what if?"

my what ifs 

would be my monday nights.

---

Got new rims, finally.

Thought you should know.

pine.

less pine.

i remember feeling rich.

you made me feel rich.

I love fall.

drawbridge.

there's no simple explanation.

it's as deep as the dip in your back

and as rocky as your spine.

it's the heart in your eye.

it's that feeling we shared.

let down the drawbridge. 

fine.

i want it.

all of it.

if you're the one for me,

no matter what i foresee,

then you will be.

--i catch colds 

and eyes 

but no breaks--

gathering skeletons.

i kept coming back to that spot-

that moment.

and for the longest time i wanted to change it.

only now am i realizing i did my best

and i don't regret a goddamn thing.

--

this spoke to me.

what's meant to be,

will.

this is the last time.

"i won't be vacant anymore,
i won't be waiting anymore."

good karma is on my side,
and even yours-

just not ours.

call it off.

"maybe i would have been something you'd be good at
maybe you would have been something i'd be good at


but now we'll never know."

i'll come to you.

change

is not always

for the best.

--

early mornings with best friends and former lovers.

make a guest room for me.

i'll wake up early and make eggs.

i'll smile when you smile.

you'll remember why you used to love me,
and surrender one last time.

lost art.

you're a lost art

a shifted memory

and the tip of my tongue.

oh what i wouldn't do.

"while he hated you, i cared about you."

you're right.

our tears are salty, not sweet.

we weep,

not for what was

but what could have been.

No matter hows strong i can be,

september 17th always wins.

you're an asshole.


"lol"

Trials of lipstick and lace

How many more times do I have to wrap my body in glitter before you notice?

Eerie.

You do not like risk. Some signs are fine with taking a chance, but you like things to remain secure and predictable. When you venture out of your shell, Moonchild, you like to know what you can expect. But avoiding risk can be risky. Never taking a chance means you may miss opportunities and adventures that might not be considered "safe." You would love to have security in every area of our life - financial, emotional, relationship, and so on. But sometimes a risk is necessary to generate the kind of security you crave. Consider a risk this week - the potential gain may be worth it.

COME

WHAT

MAY

.

cemented.

i remember seeing you across the room.

you were smiling. 

my thoughts were fleeting but my heart stood still

like a rock.

(cemented)

tragic

how the moments you want to last, never do

and the ones you want to escape are carried with you forever.

---

change for the worse.

you're not the same person.

Regrets.

Our biggest regrets are not for the things what we did,
But for what we didn't do.

months.

i'd rather be with you for three months

than no months.

afterski.

i like foreign music.

"always wear cute pyjamas. you never know who you'll meet in your dreams."

:)

i found a new song i know you'd like.

Beginnings.

"New beginnings are 

often disguised as 

painful endings..."

- Lao Tzu.

simple.

i want to wash away my mistakes with soap and steel wool.

i want to light up your living room with my bright eyes.

i want to show you the laundry doesn't have to be done alone.

i want you know how simple it is

and always has been.

i already do.

one september morning.

sometimes

we re-live moments.

and what we don't realize is

the reason we re-live that part of our past

is because it's meant to be apart of our future.

---

back to school.

when i met you.

sun. it's in your name.

The rest will make sense.

Where do you turn when there's no where else to go?

You stay still. You breathe. You feel the earth's pulse. You feel energy coursing through your veins. You feel one with the elements, with your memories, your thoughts, your feelings, your soul. You don't need to go anywhere. Be present - and the rest will make sense.

Secret.

We were a secret.

Kissed in shadows,

Held hands behind closed doors,

Deleted our thoughts as soon as we had them.

We morphed together,

Melded. Grew.

With a limit.

I'm sorry for being that limit. 

guarantee.

no guarantees.

just risks.

---

ride.

she's a short ride
but she's worth it.